I don’t do people. No, really.
I’ve always thought I’m a people person, though. Hubby’s forever saying how sorry he feels for me, because I hardly get to see my friends ever since we got married.
But I think I’ve changed. Being twenty-something, unmarried and living alone I could probably allow 15 odd people into my life very easily.
I still remember weekends. They were the best! We were a mixed group, girls and guys, that always got together once a week for bible study and then on a Saturday we’d play volleyball, braai (have a barbeque), shower, get dressed and go dancing.
Since you’ll probably never find a “Christian Dance Club”, we had to settle with the club where we felt the least uneasy. We came to be known as the ‘church group’. Don’t know if it was because none of us ever drank, or because we’d only dance with one another. Getting home at 01:00am on a Sunday morning, feet aching, totally sober but just dead tired, was one of the best feelings I can remember.
Back then, those 15 people were my comfort zone. Whatever we wanted to do – go to the zoo on a weekend, go hiking, have a picnic at the botanical gardens – we always did it together. Nice and safe.
But time goes by, lives change, people get married, move away and Facebook takes the much overrated place of personal contact, phone calls and hugs.
Through the years my ability to make friends as easily as I did before, seems to have dwindled a bit. I guess one gets more cynical in a sense, more life-weary, more aware of whom you allow in your private space. I also think my creative, seclusion-prone, right brain started to act out!
While I’ll never forget my bachelorette friends or dismiss their value in my self-exploratory twenties, the friends I made in my thirties are very close to my heart.
I guess you deal with different issues as you get older, things that you never even thought about in your earlier years. So, if you then share these moments of significance with those close to you, a certain bond is formed that somewhat resembles the blood-brotherly connection of medieval days.
And then, of course, you meet the people you spend most of your days with: your colleagues. True – some of them become much more than that. Some become your allies, your children’s play dates, your best friends.
But some people will always just stay colleagues. And I don’t think God ever intended for all of us to be BFF’s. Treating each other in a civil manner, being genuinely concerned for each other’s welfare, and applying general decency to everyone you meet should just be a standard way of living for all Christians, shouldn’t it? Even if the rumour mill gets started on your motives…
“Can anyone really harm you for being eager to do good deeds? Even if you have to suffer for doing good things, God will bless you. So stop being afraid and don’t worry about what people might do.”
1 Peter 3:13,14
Let’s stop trying to be everything to everyone. Let’s just reflect Jesus from the inside out.
“They may not remember what you said, but they’ll never forget how you made them feel.”
Make them feel loved.
Make them feel worthy.
Make them feel significant.
Friends or not.
Even if you don’t do people.
This is a New Day. I’ll find something to make you feel good about today.
This Is A New Day 