Why Worry?

Simple.  Yet profound.

Can any of you add a single hour to the length of your life by worrying?  Matthew 6:27

My HIV Story

I have to share this story with you.  About God’s divine planning, His intervention and His provision for those who seek Him…

*For the sake of anonymity, I will use fake names.

I’ve mentioned this before, but in case you don’t know:  I’m a medical representative for a pharmaceutical company.  My portfolio mainly focuses on ARV medication for HIV positive patients.

My sister-in-law is a teacher at a primary school in a township in the Eastern Cape, South Africa.  On the 1^st of December 2011, International HIV/AIDS day, her school invited me to deliver a talk on HIV to the teachers at the school.

Although I gave them really basic information, there was still an enormous amount these educated people did not know about the disease.  Which did not bode well for the illiterate, mostly blue-collar workers and unemployed part of that community.

One of the teachers attending the talk was actually a psychologist in a temporary teaching position at the time.  Since then, the government recalled thousands of temporary teaching positions across the country and she decided to open up her practice again.  Let’s call her Lorraine.

Well, a few weeks ago, Lorraine phoned me.  She was quite distressed about a patient that was referred to her by the local medical practitioner, which is also one of the doctors that I call on.  *Dr Stevens referred *Brenda to Lorraine for a very specific reason:  Brenda was 12 weeks pregnant and a routine blood check confirmed that she was also HIV positive.

From what I could gather, Brenda was in an enormous state of shock when Dr
Stevens gave her the news.  Hysteria made way for a deep depression where she could not stop crying.  That’s when Lorraine was asked to assist.  And since she heard my talk on HIV, she asked for my help in identifying and addressing Brenda’s questions and fears on the disease.

I arrived a bit early at Lorraine’s practice that morning.  She had gone to pick up Brenda from work.  Since it’s such a sensitive issue, Lorraine had to explain to her supervisor that it was a medical matter that we needed to address and that she would have her back within the hour.  I must admit:  I was glad about the time limit.  What if I could not answer her questions, alleviate all her fears?

But hubby and I did pray about this the day before.  I knew I was not going into this alone.

Brenda is this beautiful, curvaceous, African woman with a shy manner and a soft light in her eyes.  When she cries, the tears gracefully slip over her cheek, not a sound.

Because I did see her cry that first day.  Lorraine told me she was in a much improved state of mind from the previous week when she first got the news.  The initial shock must have worn off.  Now the reality was slowly setting in.

To make things worse, I got the picture of a very domineering, verbally abusive spouse.  Who did not know yet that his wife was HIV positive.

Since Dr Stevens was also *Patrick’s family doctor, we decided that he would handle that revelation and explain the need for Patrick’s own diagnostic HIV blood test.

Together, me and Lorraine shared information with Brenda, answered her questions and managed to put her mind at ease about many issues she was battling with.  When we left there that day, her main concern was how her husband would react to the news.

At this stage I guess I should tell you that she had maintained all along to have been 100% faithful in her marriage.  Which left a lot of unanswered questions as to Patrick’s own faithfulness…

The next day I got a text from Brenda:

Thank you Maxie, now I can relax, just want to assure you that I will take my medication every day, I will never risk my child health by defaulting, thanks once again

Every healthcare practitioner will tell you that to discuss faith in a professional consultation is really not advised.  However, the day we saw Brenda, both Lorraine and I felt the Lord’s presence in that room and we just had to share with her that prayer can really be the answer.  We told her that we would be praying for her and her husband and for wisdom on Dr Stevens’ part for when he needed to break the news and that she too must continue to pray herself.

A week later, I got another text:

Today, I’m so happy.  I was with Dr Stevens he told me that my husband is negative.  I’m happy because before I went to the Dr I prayed that what ever news I must accept them and live a positive life, even though I don’t understand what is happening but my heart is jumping with joy, this afternoon the Dr will tell my husband about my status, so it’s all in God’s hands.

I had to admit that I feared that Patrick would become physically abusive when he heard the news…

Much to my amazement, however:

Good Morning Maxxie, would like to find out when you are coming to *Town.  My husband requested that make an appointment with u so that we can have a session he has a lot of questions that he wants to us you.  I told him how you helped me and I’m greatful to you for helping me.  The Lord is using you to help people like me, thank you very much, pls let me know.

Today the four of us got together.  Not only was I surprised beyond belief that Patrick would ask to speak to us, he was also very gentle, very loving with Brenda.  Certainly not the man I had pictured in my mind.

I would lie if I didn’t tell you that he was concerned about the second blood test to be done in 8 weeks.  Since the virus can sometimes ‘hide’ in a window period, such subsequent tests are standard to determine infection. 

However, his biggest concern was for Brenda.  The fact that he would see her sit by herself and look so sad, even sighing without her realising it.  Just the fact that her husband picked up on that is so encouraging!  And then he said that Brenda was talking about divorce, she was feeling tremendously guilty for bringing this over their family and felt that the only way forward, was out.  But that was not what we wanted.

As we sat there, he told Brenda that he still loved her.  That they can not make any decisions until he had his second test in 8 weeks and whichever way it went, he still wanted to make their marriage work. He actually said that it would be better if they were both positive.  Not what I had expected at all! 

When Brenda’s text came through later this afternoon, I knew that I had to share her story with you:

Thanks Maxxi for everything a part of me is very happy to see that my Husbands still loves because he does not show it to me, so when I heard that, that made me to cry, yes I must forgive myself.  All I am saying is that I am a strong women and God has answered my prayers because *Patrick is still by my side.  I really don’t know were would I be if I have not met all of you, you are a blessing to me, keep up the good work that you do.  God will never stop blessing you, thanks a lot.

Of course I realise that there’s a lot of truth that still needs to be uttered, thrashed through and resolved.  For this, I’m so grateful for Lorraine.  She’ll walk this road with them from now on, helping them face the unknown and conquering their fears.

All of this has just once again proved to me:  God is all-powerful, all-knowing, the master-orchestrator of the universe. He decided, even before we were born, to send us to this town for a time like this.  To place us in this particular personal position, for a time like this.

I am not worthy, without Him I’m nothing.

But He uses whoever He pleases to fulfill His plan on this earth.

Please pray with me that the Lord will use Brenda and Patrick’s story in a powerful way to testify in their community, to their (feuding) families and into the life of their unborn child. 

 

This is a New Day.  He’s already written the end.